What the fuck is a fuck ass bob? If you have any sort of presence on social media, then you’ve probably heard the term before. In fact, you’ve more than likely seen one too, as Rihanna, Kim Kardashian, Kat from Euphoria, and plenty of others have been perpetrators of the fuck ass bob. But what actually makes a bob “fuck ass?”
Entirely different from any regular bob, the “fuck ass bob,” (also known as a FAB) is another piece of internet terminology – like “girl dinner” or “mullet daddies” – born out of one viral video and repeated until it inherits a kind of folklore sentiment.
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The phrase “fuck ass bob” originated in 2017, when it was first used in a Vine featuring two girls arguing in a classroom at Nova High School, Florida. Whilst the reason behind their fight is still a mystery, it was serious enough that one of them came up with this devastating read, shouting across the room, “You talk SO MUCH! SO MUCH… with this fuck ass BOB!”
The next most significant reference to “fuck ass bobs” – and what many people incorrectly believe to be the first – was in a Tweet posted in 2022 about the Euphoria character Kat Hernandez denying to her Principle that it was her in a viral porn video (spoiler: it was). The Tweet in question read: “i hate her. ‘is it because I’m fat Mr. Hayes’ no its because you the only one with that fuck ass bob.” After this, the phrase officially blew up.
So, what is a fuck ass bob? Not to be confused with the “jellyfish haircut” or a “Robert,” the FAB is generally considered a basic, middle-part bob that stops at the jawline; however, it must abide by some rules. According to Milo (aka @pretendingtobehot on TikTok), a relative expert on the subject, a non-negotiable of the fuck ass bob is that it “must be around chin length.”
She also claims that FABs are largely black or a dark shade of brown, and that the forehead must be exposed, meaning a bob with bangs does not qualify. However, you might’ve noticed that, in the original FAB from the 2017 Vine, bangs are present. This is where the confusion begins.
Icons of the FAB, according to Internet lore, include people like Johnny Depp as Willy Wonka (2005), Dora in Dora the Explorer (2000-present), Colette Tatou from Ratatouille (2007), and Kim Kardashian in that one video promoting SKIMS (2023). However, they do all have slightly different styles of a bob.
kourtney stole her wedding country kim stole her fuck ass bob https://t.co/pWsZgfzoI3
— Tyson (@mrtysonw) August 15, 2023
For example, whilst Johnny Depp had bangs in Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, Colette and Kim K don’t, so how can they all have fuck ass bobs? Colette actually has an undercut in Ratatouille, something that Milo says immediately rules her out of having a FAB. All elements of the FAB have been hotly debated, from length and colour to layering and bangs.
As well as the actual style of the FAB being up for debate, it’s also not clear whether having a FAB is even a bad thing. Whilst it’s generally been considered an insult, some people have contradicted that belief by arguing that the phrase isn’t inherently negative.
Based on the term’s etymology, the pre-modifying element of “[fuck ass] bob” is undeniably negative, given that the words “fuck” and “ass” when applied as adjectives are most commonly used as insults. However, it is arguable that the repetition of the phrase “fuck ass bob” over time in various different scenarios has altered its meaning.
Many people have argued that the FABs seen on the likes of Kim K, Taylor Swift, Anna Wintour, and Mary J Blige are iconic, and therefore the fact that they’re fuck ass bobs doesn’t necessarily mean they’re bad. Our resident expert Milo agrees, stating that, “you can have a bob that meets all of the qualifying traits of a fuck ass bob, and not necessarily have a bad hairstyle.”
The reality is, the only time a FAB is truly a bad thing, is when somebody tells you it is. In that case, you should feel free to wear any length, colour, or style of hair that you choose. It’s just like we learnt from Phoebe Waller-Bridge in Fleabag. Beauty’s in the eye of the beholder; what one person calls a fuck ass bob, another might say is French. So who really cares?
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